3:44 a.m. - 2013-08-29
...vacuous...
Well... Once again I've been avoiding my emotions, my tHOUghts /: its hard okay. Haha sigh
I miss him, I miss him singing me to sleep.
I miss him letting me bug him. Haha
I'm selfish, stubborn and I'm a brat... He spoiled me to the point where I forgot how it was to be alone. I'm supposed to be stronger than this but I find myself regressing to my selfish ways, to the doubting and questioning of events, things that only a child does.
I made him cry today, because I felt overwhelmed and couldn't help crying myself. I'm suppose to be stronger than this but I can't help letting him know how I feel because he is the only one that gives me attention and I feel like he understands me . Understands that I'm overwhelmed, want to run away and disappear, but also that I love him with all my heart and live in his heart.
I find myself reverting to old tricks to avoid my fragile soft spot and filling this void with vacuous banter and material longings siiiigh my heart aches
