12:43 a.m. - 2013-11-10
I want to LIVE in his light!
I miss my gordo.
He wants me to prosper and "grow" and be happy ... But idk what to do. I'm lost, everything is so gray and mild and I miss him.
U know, love is complicated, it is easier to be without it when u have never had it. I don't have anything to compare what I feel for him with, maybe that is the problem.
Life before was fine u know, it was fine... Scary but fine and I had my faith. /: now it is sooo sigh sad just SAD.
I want God to wake me up and help me. The one thing I have left is the light he gave me and I know this is all that matters, as much as it hurts. I KNOW javi is temporary, we all are, but HIS light will be forever.
